Lily,

I was looking forward to talking with my friend, Heather Mathias, today. We had a Skype chat scheduled for 7 pm today and she didn’t show. I feel like this is instant karma. I was planning to just ignore the new friends I’ve made on Facebook (Carrie, Jennifer, Rebecca,

maybe not Amanda or Cypress, because I don’t think they hate my guts, but maybe the others do), because I really liked the feeling of belonging to no one and nothing and everything and not having any awkward intimacy issues with anyone and being able to wipe the slate clean, when I got the exact experience they would get. “Hey, what happened? I thought we were friends, then she just stopped calling. I wonder what happened?” I was all excited to be a stinker, to get away with something, to get off easy and not do any work, and I “got an experience” any way. I do wonder what happened to Heather.

I’m glad I didn’t miss the mother’s meeting with Dr. Rachel she invited me to later this month (the 24th, 4 days before your birthday).

I also want to tell you that today was pleasant, only two minor times when you yelled “I want to be alone” and left (into the bathroom, closed and locked the door, just like I’ve done to you). You played with Daddy after dinner, even left me alone to work. A very much improved day over the rest of the week. You even went to bed semi-quietly, brushed your teeth, we didn’t even read books. What is happening with the stars where there’s all this drama in our lives right now.

Daddy has the day off today (Friday, I’m writing this in the wee hours, 1:14 am). So tired. But need to get the work done.

We’ll do a DIY obstacle course at Sunrise Gymnastics on Saturday 12-1. Maybe I can volunteer at Coder Dojo after that. Next Saturday, I have us volunteering at the Healing Barn 10-12. I also got a reply from University Church community garden that we can volunteer, but no hours or days yet.

Love you,
Mama

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